
Zoe Williams
Thursday September 18 2008
Department of Health researchers have revealed the nine types of heavy drinker. Presumably they want us to stop drinking heavily, but when I see anything divided into types, I think of it more like a quiz. Confused about whether your self-harming behaviour is motivated by boredom, depression or a desire to conform? Let me walk you through it. I, by the way, have identified myself as a macho drinker. "Mostly men, of all ages, they do it to stand out from the crowd." You think I'm being facetious, but it does say "mostly" men, and I do drink to excess mainly to show off. So it gets me down to a tee. Tea? Ha! With whisky in it, mate. Etc, etc.
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